Our daughter just returned from seven months away, coming home from across the Pacific via a visit to my sister, who lives in northern California. In addition to a very nice pruner, our daughter brought back a newspaper article for me to read, both courtesy of my sister.

Some of you will have seen this, but here's a scan of the article my sister sent:

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Note: A Very Silly Post, sure to offend some.

Rated "Mature" for talk of "packages", as well as images of racy men's underwear and fully-naked Iggy Pop, dimly lit but clear enough. Also, there are loads of images (sorry, dial-up friends). Almost all images in this post are links that can be clicked open for larger versions.

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[community profile] elijah_finds a couple of weeks ago, we were in a state of excited anticipation over Elijah Wood's upcoming portrayal of youthful Iggy Pop in The Passenger, having come across a lot of old video footage of Iggy performing and giving interviews in the 70's. At last, watching Iggy talking and performing, many of us began to feel that Elijah Wood could really do this and do it well.
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It was only inevitable and not merely prurient that the matter of "packages" would come up. Although I had known next to nothing about Iggy Pop and the Stooges before Elijah Wood was cast in the role, I now have read quite a bit.

Iggy had a renowned package. Read more... )How might Elijah Wood, Mr. Average Guy....

....be made to look like Iggy Pop, Mr. Trouser Snake?

There are a few options.
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Warning: Not Worksafe. Full-frontal plant nudity.

Well, it turns out a lot of you have researched Ent mating and courtship, sending me images that I absolutely have to post.
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I always wondered how the Ents produced Entings. I even have browsed a thread on a Tolkien message board, where fans were discussing what might be their method of reproduction.

Were they more human-like, with human-like sexual organs? Or did they propagate like dioecious trees, with the pollen from the flowers of the Ents dropping onto the pistils of the flowers of the Entwives?

Yesterday, by chance, a friend of my husband sent him a photo that has decided the issue for me.

Ents reproduced like humans, not day-lilies.

Here is the incontrovertible proof:

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I usually groan when relatives send me forwarded jokes and humour pieces in my email, but parts of this one made me laugh till I wept.

These are supposed to be real examples, but I almost can't believe it. I'm not a teacher, so I can't judge properly.

Why English Teachers Die Young

Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays.These excerpts are published each year to the amusement of teachers across the country. Here are last year's winners.

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
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The Oscars just ended with an upset. And, yes, I was upset. Well, "disappointed." Very. Crash....? 'Best Picture'?

Hrrrmph. *grumble grumble*
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To soothe myself, I have made a another Brokeback spoof out of manips, based on a brochure I picked up on our trip to Montana last month. I am calling it....

Jack and Ennis: 'Gone Fishin'

Warnings: Silliness, sexual innuendo.

(Continues from previous spoof, Jack and Ennis Find Montana not Nearly So Repressive as Wyoming....)

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~ Frodo, having a "Brokeback moment," as he recalls pleasant stays at the Del Mar Motel in Montana....

Twiddling my thumbs, procrastinating reading Frodo fics (recently finished last four or five engrossing chapters of RoP:Bag End and am several installments into the vivid, visceral Counterpoint). Avoiding chores and my own writing.

While busy doing all these things an e-friend linked me yet another Brokeback spoof. It's just like the "Brokeback to the Future" spoof I so enjoyed, but this one makes use of Sam and Frodo from the LotR films. It's not quite as clever as the Back to the Future version, but it gave me a few snorts and guffaws. The very last ten or fifteen seconds, especially, are well-worth it.

Here's the link to the clip....

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Warning: Spoof of the film I've loved best since LotR ahead:

On our drive to Montana for our recent “campus visit” trip, I and my daughter saw a sign for a gas station that made us both guffaw. It was in Miles City, for the Kum and Go. It could have been worse. The sign might have said, the “Cum and Go.” But, even spelled with a “K” we both laughed hard enough to make us weepy.

All this while, I had been making my daughter listen [yet again] to the soundtrack of Brokeback Mountain. (“Mom! Aren’t you sick of that yet???”)

“Hmmmm….” I thought.

“The Kum and GoBrokeback Mountain."

A manip project was born.....

* * *

Jack and Ennis Alive and Well in Montana:
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~ Jack waiting for Ennis to arrive in Montana:

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~ Heath Ledger (Ennis Del Mar) on Brokeback set with director Ang Lee....

This is just a quickie to post a link of a clip, poking good-natured fun at Brokeback Mountain.
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While I am at it, I may as well post a link to another spoof we found at the same site, poking fun at the reaction of some Americans to the perceived threat of homosexuality, Hotdogs for Homophobes.
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In response to the last entry (about the phallic water sensors that so amused me), Maeglian sent me a great link to a comic site called, Phallic Logo Awards. However, it did not show up in the journal; I only received it as an emailed reply notification. Go figure. Anyway, here's Maeglian's link, if you'd like a morning laugh:

Phallic Logo Awards:


In case you don't bother to open it, if you scroll down to the bottom (HA!) you'll see the grand prize winner, the logo for the "Brazilian Institute for Oriental Studies."

I thought it had to be fake it was so funny. But when I Googled up the institute, it's site said, "Sorry, under construction." I guess they found out the internet world was guffawing over their innocent little logo.

As Maeglian pointed out, it's supposed to be a pagoda in front of the red sun of Japan. Here it is:

Logo for The Brazilian Institute for Oriental Studies:

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[I just wrote an email to Ariel, telling her about this morning's bit of comedy. I decided to share it here.]

Ah, the unexpected rewards of a trip to the neighbourhood grocery store...!

I was running out for more soft foods this morning for our 17 year-old daughter (she had her four wisdom teeth out yesterday). As I got near the entry I stopped in my tracks as something caught my eye through the reflections of the display window. I saw what looked like a tray of full of little erections, miniature penises; flesh-coloured, complete with pronounced wedge-shaped heads and a graceful curve as they stretched upwards, as if in expectation of the random strokes of passers-by.

"What the ..." I asked myself. Were they some sort of exotic mushrooms???? I must go in and look at once!

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